"I wonder what goes through his mind when he sees us peeing in his water bowl."-- Penny Ward Moser
"Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful."-- Ann Landers
"A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself." -- Josh Billings
"Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives." -- Sue Murphy
"I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven't got the guts to bite people themselves." -- August Strindberg
"They say the dog is man's best friend. I don't believe that. How many of your friends have you neutered? "-- Larry Reeb
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.
-- Mark Twain
Acquiring a dog may be the only opportunity a human ever has to choose a relative.
-- Mordecai Siegal, Contemporary Writer
I've seen a look in dogs' eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts.
-- John Steinbeck 
What are the qualities of a cat? Cats do what they want. They rarely listen to you. They're unpredictable. They pout when they are not happy. When you want to play, they want to be left alone.
They expect you to cater to their every whim. They're moody. They leave hair everywhere. They drive you nuts and cost you money. Conclusion: They're tiny little women in fur coats.
What are the qualities of a dog? Dogs lie around all day, sprawled on the most comfortable piece of furniture in the house. They can hear a package of food opening half-a-block away but don't hear you when you're in the same room. They can look dumb and lovable at the same time. They growl when they're not happy. When you want to be alone, they want to play. They never have enough toys and they leave them everywhere. Conclusion: They're tiny little men in fur coats.--writer Jennifer G. Hickey
The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue. --Anonymous
If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went. --Will Rogers
There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. --Ben Williams
The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. --Andy Rooney
We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare and love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made. --M. Acklam
Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love and always, have to mix love and hate. --Sigmund Freud
I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. --Rita Rudner
A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. --Robert Benchley
If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise --Unknown
Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul, chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth! --Anne Tyler
Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. --Robert A. Heinlein
You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says. Wow, you're right! I never would've thought of that!' -- Dave Barry
If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then give him only two of them. --Phil Pastoret
Everyone has a critic. Usually the worst ones are those with a guilty conscience! One upset visitor to my website has this to say:
WHY DIDN'T YOU SHOW AN ADULT AMERICAN ROTTEILLER NEXT TO THE PICTURE OF THAT EURO ROTTWEILLER? YOU PICKED A POOR SAMPLE AND IT WAS NOT MATURE! THA AMERICAN ROTTWEILLER IS WELL REFINED TO MEET THE NEEDS OF AMERICANS! THANK YOU
To Which I responded:
Sorry if I offended you. Actually the dog I showed is an AKC fully registered (with breeding rights) "American Rottweiler" that belongs a good friend of mine and was three years old at the time of the photo (fully mature). If you went on to really read what my website has to say, you would have read that the ONLY true difference in a quality "American Rottweiler" and "German, Canadian, or 'European'" Rottweiler is country of birth. Reputable, "Code of Ethics Breeders" who truly follow AKC or ADRK regulations governing temperament and confirmation produce beautiful, quality "American" rottweilers. As I own several "American" born Rottweilers, I obviously have NOTHING against them, only frustration and contempt for those indiscriminate breeders who do not consider the quality of dog before breeding and are more concerned with a quick buck than bettering the breed or the unfair reputation on such magnificent animals they are helping to perpetuate.
Hope you have a better day and attempt to fully comprehend what is offending you before you go an a rampage.
To which he responded:
Madam there is such a thing as a American rottweiler and a German rottweiler. I have gone as far as to show your website to some fellow rotti owners. They all came to the same conclusion. You showed a poor example of the flawless American Rottweiler. As a matter of fact the animal you showed is a MUTT!! Not a American Rotti.
Again from me:
OK , I understand your passion for the breed as I have that passion as well. But I never state on that page whether either dog is American, German, Canadian, etc. I simply put a picture of 2 very different rotties to illustrate how indiscriminate breeding cheapens the breed. By assuming so quickly that the dog on the left is American, you must have had just as much experience with poor quality American born Rottweilers as the rest of us. Again, if you read the page, I CLEARLY state that a good breeder using "Code of Ethics" breeding produces beautiful "American" born rottweilers. A proper American Rottweiler by AKC standards is still a magnificent rottweiler. The main problem here in the US is that too many "back-yard" breeders do not care about AKC standards when reproducing, and AKC does not physically inspect each dog and bitch to insure that it conforms to standards both physically and temperamentally before it is bred. This puts all the responsibility on the breeder, and many just abuse that resulting in poor quality dogs. Again, "American" rottweiler or "German" rottweiler, etc only tells you where the dog was BORN. Also CLEARLY stated (first sentence on that page) on my web site. Now if you believe there are FACTS that are incorrect on my web page, I would be happy to discuss those with you.
Thank you though for showing my website!
His response:
American standard basher go to germany since you love there standards.
SIDEBAR:
Okay, first of all, are you 4 years old and on the playground? Will "I know you are and what am I?" be your next response? Anyway, I will go back to Germany and bring back some more fine dogs. Also, my five-year-old notes that Germany is a Proper name and should be capitalized and that "there" should be spelled "their."
Typically this area is reserved for e-mails, but I had phone conversation recently with a local "breeder" that I had to share it:
(From me) "So your dogs are German Rottweilers? Are the parents imported?"
(From 'the breeder') "No."
"How far back on the pedigree for the German Blood?"
"The dog does not have to be from Germany to be a German Rottweiler." (Well, I wonder then, just why do they call them German Rottweilers?) "The way you tell a German Rottweiler is by the webbing between their toes."
"Um....yeah..." (based on this theory, my neighbor believes she has seen some German Ducks!) "Maybe you can show that to me."
"The parents are not here on the premesis. They don't live here.(what a shocker!)
"What about health clearences?"
"What do you mean?"
"OFA/PENN hip and elbow, heart, eyes..."
"We don't do any of that, but I've been breeding for over 10 years..."
"And you never contemplated testing for the main genetic diseases that plague Rottweilers?" (because of moroms like you!) "What kind of guarantee do you give with your pups?"
"Oh, we don't give a guarantee, but you shouldn't have a problem with the puppy." (Now that's some trustworthy reassurance!)
"Wow! and you only want $400 for your pups!?"
More Stupid E-mails (My 3-year old would reprimand me for using "the S word" as stupid is on the naughty word list in our house, but you'll see why these people deserve it and then some...)
As many of you have had the pleasure of finding out, there are many breeders that should not have an ant farm, let alone raise such a noble dog as the Rottweiler. Just like everyone else with an e-mail address, I receive lots of those annoying chain e-mails. Usually I just delete, but when it comes from another breeder, I will often open it in case it is something of importance. I truly wish I had just deleted this one as it enraged me to
the core. For those who don't know "BSL" or "Breed Specific Legislation" are laws against specific dog breeds (like the rottweiler). I am obviously against BSL as I believe the individual dog (or usually bad owner) should be punished, and not the entire breed--hence the slogan "Ban the deed, not the Breed." This particular breeder preached against BSL, which I agree with whole heartedly. However, what I do not understand is how you could be asking people to be breed tolerant, to not have ignorant presumptions about a particular dog based solely on his origin, but then turn around and propagate racist literature against people based solely on their origin. I guess her dislike of prejudicim, hatred and racism extends only to canines. This is the e-mail I received earlier this afternoon and my responses:
George Carlin's
Solution to Save Gasoline
Bush wants us to cut the amount of gas we use.....
The best way to stop using so much gas is to deport 11 million illegal immigrants!
That would be 11 million less people using our gas. The price of gas would come down.....
Bring our troops home from Iraq to guard the Border....
When they catch an illegal immigrant crossing the border, hand him a canteen, rifle and some ammo
and ship him to Iraq ...
Tell him if he wants to come to America then he must serve a tour in the military....
Give him a soldier's pay while he's there and tax him on it.....
After his tour, he will be allowed to become a citizen since he defended this country.....
He will also be registered to be taxed and be a legal patriot.....
This option will probably deter illegal immigration and provide a solution for the troops in Iraq and the aliens trying to make a better life for themselves......
If they refuse to serve, ship them to Iraq anyway, without the canteen,
rifle or ammo.....
Problem solved.....
If you think this is a good solution to both the problems, forward it to your friends. ...........
I just did..........
To which I did not hesitate in responding as follows:
Okay, maybe you shouldn't forward this crap to someone whose husband is from El Salvador, and whose 4 kids are Hispanic. My last name should have been your first CLUE! My husband came here from El Salvador as a kid after he was shot in the abdomen during a civil war in El Salvador. Because he came here illegally, even though he was just a kid, it was a long, hard road to get his citizenship--many years, and thousands of dollars. EVERY MAN, WOMAN AND CHILD NOW LIVING IN THE UNITED STATES IS THE PRODUCT OF IMMIGRATION.
As a Unites States Army Veteran who was stationed at the Pentagon during September 11th and lost several friends, no one has greater appreciation for our troops than me and I resent your implications.
For someone who is against "Breed Specific Legislation", I am surprised to see you propagating such racist and stereotypical literature. Or maybe banning presumptive prejudices should only apply to dogs and not to people?? Perhaps you should take the time to educate yourself a little before mindlessly succumbing to the mass perception. Sure, there are a lot of immigrants who come here and are absolutely useless, but honey, we do not have to look to our illegal immigrants to find poor examples of the human race.
And since you so adamantly believe that only those who take up arms for our country should be "allowed" to receive citizenship, when was the last time you picked up a weapon in defense of your loved ones?
To which her lame response was:
The key word is illegal. It is different, if everyone is here legally its not a problem. I was 21 years old driving 70 mph on the interstate with a child. A black car with 6 other people (overloaded ) was doing 20 mph in the fast lane. A trash truck (big BFI Truck) swirved around my left blind spot to see the little black car that had to many people in it, doing 20 mph! At that point we had a 9 car fatal accident that put me in ICU for a week, and almost died, the lady in front of me went through the windshield and the cars behind me squashed me like a sardine! The child in my car was severly hurt!
The reason is 6 illegal immergrants had no license, a stolen car, no passport, or anything that crossed the border illegally, they went to jail but that didn't fix the 24,000 medical bill not including the other people.
I have no problem with anybody here as long a they are legal!
SIDEBAR: First of all, if she was going 70mph and the little black car was going 20mph, she would have been miles ahead within seconds--sounds like road rage on her part! Secondly, I'm sure it was their illegal status that made the little black car go slow, not them being lost, or mechanical issues, or even distraction by another car speeding past at 70mph! This is an accident I would love to see the police report for. If she was stuck with the bill, then more than likely she was at fault! Carrying a grudge against your scapegoat doesn't change anything.
At any rate, this was my response:
Again, my husband was illegal for 20 years--he was unmarried and had no family--no way to become legal on your own at 12 years old. He worked 2 jobs to support himself and his daughter, while going to High School and become the first member of his family to graduate High School, again while he was illegal. You can not make assumptions and generalizations. If it had been a car full of rednecks, would it have been okay that they were "overloaded" or going slow? Or would you now be campaigning against caucasians? It sounds like it was the truck that caused the accident anyway, and that the car "full of illegals" was simply caught in the middle. But that is not the point, point is just like it's stupid to ban all rotties because there have been a few bad ones that were a product of society, it is just as ignorant to assume that all illegal immigrants are sub-human--how was it you put it in your e-mail--worthy of being sent to Iraq with no water and unarmed to "solve the problem." Sounds like something Hitler would say.
One liners from some real Wizards that have contacted us:
"I have a real Rolex, can I trade it for one of your puppies?"
"I see the deposit is $500. Can I get a puppy for $100?"
(my reply) "Sure, go to your local animal shelter!"
"If I get your pick puppy, but I only want it for a pet, how cheap can I get it?"
"Do you have anything available that I can get to guard my used car lot?"
(my reply) "I assume you mean adult, because using a child would be ridiculous. Are you wanting an armed guard or unarmed (this can affect the salary range)? And how much are you planning on paying per hour?"
Some of you understand my sarcastic sense of humor and are reading this and smiling, others are confused. Not sure which category this chap fell in because he never wrote back! ;-)'
"Is Diesel for sale?"
(my reply) "Is your child for sale?"
"How much money can I make breeding?"
(my reply) "Well, I have sold my pups, youth and imports this year for a grand total of $17,000. If you take from that my expenses: about $800/ mo. on dog and puppy food, treats and toys (about $9,600/ yr.); vet expenses on puppies (about $2000/ litter for prenatal care of the bitch, tail and dew claw removal of the pups, microchipping, vaccinations, de-worming, flea/tick preventative, heartworm preventative, and puppy check-ups); vet expenses of adults (about $250/ mo.--about $3000/yr.-- for Frontline and Inteceptor, about $150/adult for annual vaccinations and check-ups; import and customs fees ($1000-$1500/ import); So, lets see--that's about negative $2,250, but that does not include the extra expense of a sick puppy or adult, whelping supplies or the whelp box, items for the take home puppy care package, travel and entry fee expenses for the dogs shows, my expenses of new imports for Guardian Rottweilers, nearly $1000 per adult to do all health clearances for breeding, the new couch one of the puppies ate, all the sleepless nights and hard work, and of course all the poop you can scoop! So all in all--I guess that's probably why my husband works 2 full time jobs and installs carpet on the side!!
Hope this was helpful"
And of course my favorite (never gets old!) "You expect me to pay HOW MUCH for a dog!?!"
" No, I expect you to pay that for a companion, best friend and guardian. One from carefully selected bloodlines chosen specifically for their temperament, confirmation and health. Lifetime breeder support, a companion willing to always have your back, even if you are wrong, never passing judgment, and years worshiping you just for being you with unconditional love and wet slobbery kisses. I have known MANY dogs in my time (all were two legged) and none fit that description. That is the price of a Guardian Rottweiler. You can probably get a "dog" for much cheaper. "
Here is a beauty that my daughter came across in our local paper "The Indianapolis Star" :
"ROTTWEILER AKC Pups of German distant, very lrg., blk & mahogany. Parents on site. Great w/kids, $550. "
The funny part for those that did not catch it was that they probably meant to say "of German descent" but the irony is that the German bloodlines (if any) are probably VERY DISTANT!